Let’s Have a Spa Day

Lately, it seems like every post starts with me apologizing for my tardiness in posting...however, this time I have a good reason...Anna😁

Our youngest grand daughter joined us in St. Augustine.  However, before we get to Anna’s story, let’s backtrack to cover the time between my last post and St. Augustine.

We have traveled over 350 miles since our last post.  We left Key Largo and headed to Miami.  About 2 miles from our anchor spot we both heard a thump-thump against the hull.  It was a clear day, with clear water, and neither of us saw any debris.  We slowed, looked around...checked behind the boat...nothing, so we continued.  After anchoring, I looked over the stern and saw a black line drifting out behind the boat in the current.  I’m so glad there is a diver on board to handle this type of issue👍

This beautiful sunset picture might lead you to believe we were in a peaceful and serene environment...don’t be fooled.  From the moment we dropped the anchor we missed the Keys!  Everything felt hectic, tense, and inconsiderate.  It started with a wakeboard boat pulling someone in circles around us while Keith was trying to dive under our boat.  We had a dive flag up, but I’m sure no one in Biscayne Bay had a clue about what that meant.  No one followed rules of the road, or even displayed any gestures of common courtesy.  The radio chatter (that went on well into the night) was full of yelling, cursing, and threats of face pummeling.  It felt like we fell through a black hole after weeks in the laid back Keys.  Little did we know that in a short 48 hours we would feel like yelling, cursing, and doing a little pummeling of our own...we didn’t of course, but we were tempted.

Our sincere hope was for a weather window that would allow us to pass offshore from Miami to Stuart, which would effectively bypass a two day - 43 bridge (30 need to be opened) nightmare...as you can see from this forecast we missed our chance, and we were not going to sit here for a week hoping for improvement.  It looks like we will have to do something the we swore we would never do again...

“We both agree that we will never take that route again.  The next time we need to transit this area it will be in the ocean!” Quote taken from January 2020 post.

And so I began preparing for a 2 day, 43 bridge transit...ugh!

I meticulously follow the route and note every bridge we will encounter. This shows the first bridge we will encounter (on the second day of this journey) is Linton Blvd bridge.  We can clear this bridge (the * means we must lower our antennas) with a bridge clearance of 30 feet.  We need a minimum of 24 ft clearance with our antennas down and 32 with them up.  Also, this plan shows that we will encounter this bridge 1 mile from where we lifted anchor.  The next bridge, Atlantic Ave., will be in 1.3 miles and we can not clear this bridge so the document shows the schedule of opening, which is on the 1/4 & 3/4 hour, and instead of clearance the channel used to hail the bridge tender.  Easy peasy...right?  Actually, day 1 went very well.  We cleared 25 bridges in a distance of 40 miles, in just over 10 hours.  Day 2 started out strong, but things deteriorated at the Southern Blvd bridge.

It was a very windy and choppy day (even in the ICW).  This is where I begin a bit of a rant...so if you don’t feel like ranting with me, please skip to the water picture😉

Timing was perfect to make the 10:15 opening at Southern Blvd.  Two boats were waiting for the open on the windward side so I offered to hold back and let them through first, as is customary.  However, at 10:15 instead of opening the bridge, the tender announced that due to a motorcade out of Mar-a-Lago he would have to hold the opening until they were clear.  The only thing I have to say about this is...UGH!!! I can’t believe Mr. T ruined my perfect bridge mojo!

What started out to be a doable 15 minutes to cover 1.8 miles ended up being an undoable (for us) 7 minutes to cover 1.8 miles.  So instead of catching the 10:30 opening for Royal Park I was now looking at the 11:00.  Covering 1.8 miles in 37 minutes can be a leisurely float on the ‘lazy river’ on a nice calm day, but we did not have a nice calm day!  Winds were on the nose at 20-25, which required at least 6 mph movement to keep the bow pointed in the direction we wanted to travel.  

Needless to say, the next 37 minutes were not fun. I spent the last 15 minutes holding station close to the bridge, which required a LOT of transmission and throttle work.  Again, two vessels were awaiting passage on the windward side, so I told them to come through first and I would hold back.  I passed through at 11:03, and was happy to see that I was easily going to make the 11:15 opening of Flagler with only .7 miles to cover in 12 minutes.  

Flagler was the last bridge I needed opened before my helm duty was over...so I was happy.  I thanked the Royal Park tender for the opening and bid him a great afternoon.  To my dismay, he returned with a question wondering if I was going to pass under Flagler.  I replied, yes!  He proceeded to scold me for requesting an opening “when I didn’t need one”, and added that the offense carried a “$10,000 fine”.  

He told me to consult my chart!  I was momentarily confused.  I created our travel/bridge plan two days prior, and looked at the height of every bridge.  I had a system to indicate if we could pass under the bridge without an opening, and placed an asterisk in front of the bridges that required lowering antennas in order to make it under.  Had I made a mistake on these two??  

By this time I was trying to hold station in front of Flagler in tight quarters, with high winds, while dodging three other boats in the same situation.  I still managed to open the info window for each bridge and saw the vertical clearance was stated at 21 feet.  At the same time the Royal Park tender radios me and asks for my documentation number and owner’s name.  Now my patience level is going down while my blood pressure is shooting up. 

I respond and tell the man that I am confused, because my chart shows a 21 ft clearance for both bridges while I need 24 ft with antennas down (on a perfect day, but would need at least 25 in this weather) and 32 ft with antennas up...maybe he has confused me with another vessel.  In fact, one of the vessels that passed through was a much smaller Grand Banks.  He responds that ‘Right Hand’ is the vessel he is talking to, and proceeds to tell me that his visual sighting technique showed I had 10 ft clearance and did not need an opening.  I wanted to reply that I think he is either drinking on the job, or that he needs a remediation course on how the read the inch-high-private-eye telepathic height indicator he was using...Clearly the instructions he read on the Cracker Jack box were missing a few steps!

Luckily, Keith stepped in and took the mic, as I was still battling at the helm, and he could tell my fuse was getting short. Incidentally, the Flagler tender did not question my open request.  After Keith argued with the guy for a few more minutes, and as I recognized his fuse burning down...I told him to just give the guy our documentation number and name...I would love to see this guy in court!  

Thankfully, Flagler opened on time and we proceeded through with the parade of boats.  Of course all of the boats around us heard the altercation, and all they could do was shake their heads and give us the reassuring 🤷🏻‍♂️ living emoji symbol.  We will keep you posted if we hear anything else about our $10,000 fine😡

Even after the headache of the bridges we were able to confirm that selecting the inside route was the right choice.  This was the view of the ocean as we passed an inlet, and the Coast Guard was announcing 7-9 ft waves outside...yikes!

There are always interesting sights in the canals.  This boat has more than double the horsepower of our boat in just one of these (450 hp) engines.

We are happy to see continuous dredging operations.   Perspective - the claw is not going to eat the guy.

Make sure you stay in the channel!  At high tide this looks like a huge, open bay...but at low tide you can see all of the oyster bars.

Life through the eyes of a 4 year old (soon to be 5) is always interesting.  Anna met us in St. Augustine so she could become crew for the next leg of our journey.  We spent the first day exploring St. Augustine where the trolley ride was a big hit.  Upon our return to the boat, she wanted to have a water squirting dance party on the top deck.  We agreed that was a great idea, as long as she wore these wash clothes on her feet so she wouldn’t slip off the deck😉...you missed a spot.

Due to Covid, and our travels, it had been over a year since we had seen Anna...so getting reacquainted was interesting.  Conversations were enlightening.

The first day on the boat...

Anna: Grandmom, let’s have a spa day on the boat

Me: what kinds of things would you like to do

Anna: we could soak our feet and put cucumbers on our eyes

Me: we could soak our feet, but I ate all the cucumbers and we won’t be going to a store for at least a week

Anna: oh, [long processing time to comprehend] well we could put on princess dresses

Me: I don’t have a princess dress, but you can put yours on

Anna: [light sigh] well we could paint our nails

Me: I don’t have any nail polish

Anna: [heavy sigh with eye roll] well we could put on makeup to look pretty

Me: I don’t own any makeup, and even if we got some, I don’t know how to put it on. I think we look pretty without makeup

Anna: [exasperated sigh with extensive eye roll] well what can we do for a spa day

Me: we can soak our feet, sip hot tea, and I will give you a back rub.

Anna: [slightly unenthusiastic] fine

That night at dinner...

Me: Anna, why don’t you eat a few bites of your chicken, your muscles need some protein

Anna: that’s alright Grandmom, I don’t really like muscles, they aren’t very pretty

Me: [exasperated sigh with extensive eye roll] I know you are excited about our kayak trip, but you can’t paddle a kayak if you don’t have any muscles.

Okay, I guess little muscles will be alright.

Sharing my world...priceless.

At the first sign of an insect bite, she was ready to retreat to the boat spa, but the oysters captured her attention.  As we approached exposed oysters, they would snap shut and shoot little geysers of water into the air.  Very cool, and good for a lot of giggles!

On her second boat trip she got cucumbers, and brought her own polish for some stylish toe nails. We have hyphenated her name, she is now our ‘boat girl- princess!‘

Hoping you can share your joys with loved ones.